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RACKET LISTS: American Hysteria

The nation of witch hunters whose lost "sense of decency" probably never existed

Caden Olson's avatar
Caden Olson
Apr 29, 2026
∙ Paid
(Illustration by Daniel Medina)

“When things are going bad, and there’s people you need to confront, just be sure it doesn’t turn into a witch pursuit thing.” — Randy Marsh

Americans love a good scandal. Or, more accurately, we love to throw our shit at the shadows of leering boogeymen while the real scandals go mostly unnoticed.

From the Covid vaccine’s Mark of the Beast to the Moloch-worshipping Epstein class, from ritual preschool murders to commies in the state department, the AMERICAN HYSTERIA has always had a special touch of insanity. Descending from those Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God, Americans inherited a predilection for moral mania and “witch pursuit things” that seem all but baked into the country’s genetic code.

While the manic tendrils of outrage and suspicion creep into every nook of political and social life, a brief history of nine American hysterical episodes, from Epstein to Salem, where we first discovered our love of hunting the satanic cabal.

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