Mr. Zelensky Comes to Washington: Transcript

Volodymyr Zelensky plays Triumph the Insult Comic Dog in an unforgettably obnoxious White House visit, all but assuring an end to U.S. aid. Dumb? Maybe, but also "great television," as Trump put it

“From the very beginning of the war, we’ve been alone.”

Forget the WEF, the WTC, and WHO. After Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky’s visit to Washington today, the new reigning international body is WTF! Did that really happen?

Zelensky’s much-anticipated meeting with Donald Trump and J.D. Vance Friday afternoon led to one of the weirdest Oval Office scenes in history. What started as nervous diplomacy ended as a Three Stooges pie-fight, with the black-costumed Ukrainian leader leaving as two eyeholes covered in cream.

Trump and Vance fared better, but were clearly taken by surprise. Both were expecting Zelensky to sign a deal forking over $500 billion in rare earth development rights in exchange for American funding during the last three years of war. Not until early into the photo op did they realize they’d been punked.

This was the beginning of the end of the Zelensky legend. He came to Washington as the tough-talking spokesmodel for the “rules-based international order,” and left as a costumed pre-teen sent home with an empty trick-or-treat basket: