I’m not creative enough to enter Matt’s contest, but I will chime in to say I want more of this kind of content! Keep mocking these dummies, Matt. It’s just as important as your hard investigative stuff, to show Americans how pathetic their erstwhile self-proclaimed ruling class is.
Also, I look forward to the day you get on a panel with any of these legacy media hacks and shoot these hilarious and deadly-true barbs right at their faces—that would be must-see TV. The writing is good, but the live action version would be even better.
Frankly, I can’t stand Friedman, he’s a witless hack who inserts little ditties in order to obfuscate his lack of direction.
His copy editor, his manager, his stringer, and his orifice that’s closest to the ground is controlled by the alphabet agencies. Its been decades since he wrote anything worthwhile but then again its been decades since I read anything with his name attached to it.
The problem with Friedman and others like him is they believe their own press clippings. No matter what anyone says, if they don’t agree with him they are Hitler. Nothing or no one will change his mind, he’s right, period. Poor guy
I'm not sure (my view) if Matt and Walter think they can save the MSM--convince it that it is still possible to regain moral conscience and redemption--or--out of a sense of pity--blinded to the psyop it has become --can't accept that the mercenary manipulative little whores lying for the managerial/surveillance machine and the financial/political grifters they work for aren't lying manipulative little whores. I had to abandon the poison decades ago.
O.K.--I know the machine is still in place and it holds far to many of our fellow citizens in thrall. Calling out the lie and the liars is necessary--And I'm with RACKET 'till the wheels fall off. But the chasm splitting and wounding the American psyche is deeper wider and bloodier every day. Bottom line--I guess we're all in on the belief that truth and truth speakers can light enough of this darkness to show us the way forward.
(Geeze Louise--Where did all that come from?) Keep rocking' forward PH. :)
Well, sure, you listed a whole long list of subversive ops undertaken by the CIA against the duly elected President of the United States -- but the important thing is that nobody's been punished for it, so we can safely assume they've ceased their fuckery.
Haha, good one. Funny — it never hit me until this moment how furious he’d be to learn a Costco membership is tougher to get than becoming a Hitler. As I often say...Taibbi's readers are the best. :) :) :)
Why is it that no one ever says anything good about Hitler? Nobody is all bad, no one is irredeemable.
He must have done something good / made something better? Something like better pensions for WW1 disabled veterans, or maybe trains running on time, or Germany’s GDP or unemployment rate? Wasn’t he an early environmentalist? Didn’t he work with young people? What about the Volkswagen?
Of course, I’m joking, but as soon as we begin teaming up, tribalizing, doing the old “it’s us versus them” routine, we cut ourselves off from ever understanding what actually happened / what is real.
When I see a byline that includes NYT, WaPo, Atlantic, Axios, Guardian, etc, I blow right by it. Now, when I read Matt’s recapitulation of Friedman’s op-Ed’s, I realize that I have missed out on something.
I am praying that the PMC, the "parasite managerial class" and empire managers like Friedman are down to their last gasps...certainly the air is let out of their balloons. While I am not a Marxist, Karl Marx did make useful observance of material conditions, ie, dialectical materialism. We are now fully 40 years into deindustrialization, which started whole-hog with Reagan, btw, and all the former producers are now service workers and the numbers of parasites has ballooned. THEY are all the"takers" and there are no "makers," quite the opposite of Paul Ryan's homage to Ayn Rand. With the U.S. producing no added value, aka "financialization," all we have to listen to are fucking useless parasites: in government, in media, in academia, in corporate monopoly oligarchy. Now, members of the former working class are the only people who get it, everyone else is talking absolute bullsh*t. A president making actual and concrete, albeit awkward, strides toward peace is being shot at, defamed, cheated by the effing secret police, and the country devolving into a B movie version of kind of 21st Century USSR.
I was definitely entertained by this but, to be frank, if you had asked me, I would have guessed that Friedman had died several years back. Kinda stunned to see that he is still published somewhere.
“Oh come on, why are you still going on about (insert massive national security scandal here)? It doesn’t mean anything at this point and will totally never happen again.” - The CIA on a day that ends in “Y”
I remember when I liked, or at least enjoyed, Friedman’s writing. That was a very long time ago. Now, William Shatner must envy Friedman’s unintentional self-parody.
That video of TF on why it was good we went to Iraq made me spit bullets. Bet that stupid fucker never let one of his kids go fight in that stupid useless war. TF needs a public caning from the moms of America. So assholian.
Trump has destroyed more people than Thanos. He snaps his fingers and people's minds just disintegrate. YOu can see it happening in real time. For what's it worth, I don't think Friedman himself has TDS. He seems like he is going along to get along, which explains replacement AI level of his writing.
Colbert firing is the first of many. The peak of shrill anti-Trumpism is in the rearview mirror. Will be interesting who adopts to the changes and who chooses to become extinct. Colbert clearly chose the latter.
And even Karolyn’s Levitt, such a youngster, but comes to press conferences with receipts. I love her comment the other day when asks if Trump would allow protesters. Well, that’s a stupid question she says. She’s learning quickly from her boss and she’s doing it well.
The world is flat. Friedman is a twat. NYT and CIA are pink pussy hats. We support Matt.
I’m not creative enough to enter Matt’s contest, but I will chime in to say I want more of this kind of content! Keep mocking these dummies, Matt. It’s just as important as your hard investigative stuff, to show Americans how pathetic their erstwhile self-proclaimed ruling class is.
Also, I look forward to the day you get on a panel with any of these legacy media hacks and shoot these hilarious and deadly-true barbs right at their faces—that would be must-see TV. The writing is good, but the live action version would be even better.
I still am rooting for him to punch Bill Maher for dissing Walter Kirn.
As I recall, Matt offered to pull Bill's arms off. I loved that Chewbacca reference.
“I suggest a new strategy…let the indie journalist win!”
I am still waiting for “Substack Guy” and “ So-called Journalist” gear.
Bring back “Flathead: The Peculiar Genius of Thomas L. Friedman”. My first exposure to Matt’s wit.
Stop giving him the satisfaction of being talked about when he's not around.
Matt is the best!
Frankly, I can’t stand Friedman, he’s a witless hack who inserts little ditties in order to obfuscate his lack of direction.
His copy editor, his manager, his stringer, and his orifice that’s closest to the ground is controlled by the alphabet agencies. Its been decades since he wrote anything worthwhile but then again its been decades since I read anything with his name attached to it.
Missed out on this. Rototools. All of them.
Faster then flies mate 🤣
Fleas, but, yes, great line.
Yuri has been sitting on this contest for a awhile.!
Mean mister Mustache died in his sleep
Now he’s buried in NYT’s Stock
And NPR still talks about how badly they are shocked
But Matt expected it to happen
He knew he’d lost control
When he built a fire in his office
And shot it full of holes
:) You bet!!
The problem with Friedman and others like him is they believe their own press clippings. No matter what anyone says, if they don’t agree with him they are Hitler. Nothing or no one will change his mind, he’s right, period. Poor guy
Bravo
Yuri your shooting from the quip, again and I love it!
"the Buster Keaton of American letters." LOL. One of your best lines ever.
Agreed! Loved the incomplete Mr. Mustache lyrics, too!
My only complaint is that last week I named John Bolton Mr. Mustatchio...I think it fits Johnny B even better than Mr. Mustache fits Tommy F...
But Tom’s got the original pornstache. That soup strainer on Bolton’s face can’t be called a mustache. More like walrus whiskers.
Amazing!
That was a great one. Laughed out loud at that one.
"But the Times exists now to describe the American public’s desire to think for itself as illegitimate."
Matt wins The Pithiest Line of the month, if not the decade.
Matt's right - the paper that once started conversations now exists to end them.
I'm not sure (my view) if Matt and Walter think they can save the MSM--convince it that it is still possible to regain moral conscience and redemption--or--out of a sense of pity--blinded to the psyop it has become --can't accept that the mercenary manipulative little whores lying for the managerial/surveillance machine and the financial/political grifters they work for aren't lying manipulative little whores. I had to abandon the poison decades ago.
O.K.--I know the machine is still in place and it holds far to many of our fellow citizens in thrall. Calling out the lie and the liars is necessary--And I'm with RACKET 'till the wheels fall off. But the chasm splitting and wounding the American psyche is deeper wider and bloodier every day. Bottom line--I guess we're all in on the belief that truth and truth speakers can light enough of this darkness to show us the way forward.
(Geeze Louise--Where did all that come from?) Keep rocking' forward PH. :)
Humor lives on after the flashlight dies.
They don't have to. As few as a dozen men can bend history in unimaginably wonderful ways.
They know it can’t be saved.
Now THAT'S a good line as well.
Matt sure enough knows how to turn a phrase. :)
People who think for themselves are a decreasing fraction of NYT readers.
Just posted the exact same thing. We’re awesome.
That line stood out as if in bold type. Perfect.
Mean Mr mustache
Writes for the Times
Shills for some dimes
Trying to make his mark
Mixed metaphors are his bag
Thinks we live in Brobdingnag
Gray lady is a rotten old hag
Such an ink-stained wretch
Inked stained wretch
(Polythene Pam)
But you should see Matt Taibbi
He gives us news that is partisan-free
He and Walter are tops
Matt’s caustic prose really pops
Yes you could say he is satirically lit
Okay this is pretty excellent- never thought I’d see Brobdingnag in a rhyme.
My literary life is complete.
Do you have any signed Dick Radatz shirts?
Well, sure, you listed a whole long list of subversive ops undertaken by the CIA against the duly elected President of the United States -- but the important thing is that nobody's been punished for it, so we can safely assume they've ceased their fuckery.
"fuckery" is what they do.
Well, it would seem like Tulsi is culling the herd.
🙌🏻
Ditto, is all I can say
OMG Commander, you're killing it as usual!
Given how many people are Hitler these days it’s starting to look like the Boys from Brazil up in here
Hitler called. He wants his Hitler back
Haha, good one. Funny — it never hit me until this moment how furious he’d be to learn a Costco membership is tougher to get than becoming a Hitler. As I often say...Taibbi's readers are the best. :) :) :)
Why is it that no one ever says anything good about Hitler? Nobody is all bad, no one is irredeemable.
He must have done something good / made something better? Something like better pensions for WW1 disabled veterans, or maybe trains running on time, or Germany’s GDP or unemployment rate? Wasn’t he an early environmentalist? Didn’t he work with young people? What about the Volkswagen?
Of course, I’m joking, but as soon as we begin teaming up, tribalizing, doing the old “it’s us versus them” routine, we cut ourselves off from ever understanding what actually happened / what is real.
When I see a byline that includes NYT, WaPo, Atlantic, Axios, Guardian, etc, I blow right by it. Now, when I read Matt’s recapitulation of Friedman’s op-Ed’s, I realize that I have missed out on something.
One of those Hitlers might run in 2028 -- gotta lay the groundwork early.
Hitler is Hitler
I recently heard Trump was Stalin. But I thought was Hitler. Make up your mind folks.
Peppermint Schnapps or White Russian? Pick your poison... ;)
I prefer Vodka to Schnaps so… I have to throw a third option in 1930’s and 40’s historical figures, but maybe he is…. Franco.
The same Stalin FDR called Uncle Joe!
Speaking of praying for someone...
I am praying that the PMC, the "parasite managerial class" and empire managers like Friedman are down to their last gasps...certainly the air is let out of their balloons. While I am not a Marxist, Karl Marx did make useful observance of material conditions, ie, dialectical materialism. We are now fully 40 years into deindustrialization, which started whole-hog with Reagan, btw, and all the former producers are now service workers and the numbers of parasites has ballooned. THEY are all the"takers" and there are no "makers," quite the opposite of Paul Ryan's homage to Ayn Rand. With the U.S. producing no added value, aka "financialization," all we have to listen to are fucking useless parasites: in government, in media, in academia, in corporate monopoly oligarchy. Now, members of the former working class are the only people who get it, everyone else is talking absolute bullsh*t. A president making actual and concrete, albeit awkward, strides toward peace is being shot at, defamed, cheated by the effing secret police, and the country devolving into a B movie version of kind of 21st Century USSR.
(tambourine sounds....iv-i on the organ.....rimshot).....somebody say amen.....CAN i get a witness?
Where in the hell is that clapping emoji!
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Ditto what you said.
But, but,but AI! Watch the rabbit...
The serious version…
Post Scarcity.
The country that gets to 'robots that build robots' first wins EVERYTHING.
They instantly become THE manufacturing, military, food production, economic, tech, and [fill in the blank because it's a lot] Superpower.
You can't build 'robots that build robots' without any manufacturing.
It's amazing how much manufacturing was outsourced after tech and post scarcity was a very well known thing.
It's hard to see this as anything but intentional.
+1
Nailed it. 🤯
Hey, we still make multiple deadly weapons…
So my partner is fixing dinner and I say: "Matt's picking a fight with Friedman."
She: "Friedman's an idiot."
Me: "Matt says he's mean."
She: "He's not mean, he's retarded. Read anything he's written about China."
Go get 'em Matt.
does she have a sister?
🤣🤣🤣
Mean AND retarded. He can be both. Throw in bloodthirsty and pompous too!
Omg! Funniest column ever! Thanks Matt. You keep outdoing yourself every single day. I hope Friedman reads this.
I laughed as much as I did when first reading "Catch-22." High praise, indeed.
Last night I watched Catch-22 again after many years. What a cast! Universe or simulation is funny!
Agree. This was maybe the best.
I was definitely entertained by this but, to be frank, if you had asked me, I would have guessed that Friedman had died several years back. Kinda stunned to see that he is still published somewhere.
It takes a comic genius to make a dead man funny.
Me too. I just thought the dude was dead. Maybe he is…
Terminal douche, so to speak.
Me too
Mean Mr. Mustache says "Suck On This"
Taking the piss while he cheers for war
Big Macs will keep us in line
The world is flat by design
Moscow-Mex is simply divine
Such a dumb old man
Such a dumb old man
His missus Ann helps comb his mop
Writing his slop for the bourgeoisie
Trump is a deplorable lout
Biden took too long to drop out
Never plagued by fear or self-doubt
Such a stupid old man
Stupid old man
“Oh come on, why are you still going on about (insert massive national security scandal here)? It doesn’t mean anything at this point and will totally never happen again.” - The CIA on a day that ends in “Y”
I remember when I liked, or at least enjoyed, Friedman’s writing. That was a very long time ago. Now, William Shatner must envy Friedman’s unintentional self-parody.
sizzafitz :) :) :)
"Something something democracy vaccine war derp," a complete history of the 2020s.
That video of TF on why it was good we went to Iraq made me spit bullets. Bet that stupid fucker never let one of his kids go fight in that stupid useless war. TF needs a public caning from the moms of America. So assholian.
It was creepy how titilated he looked by what he was saying.
But how was the war in Iraq not good for us? Wasn't it good for Israel?
Are we not still at war? There is no good here.
Hi Thea, I have a tendency to be a bit sarcastic...Apologies.
ah. no worries.
That was just sick.
Trump has destroyed more people than Thanos. He snaps his fingers and people's minds just disintegrate. YOu can see it happening in real time. For what's it worth, I don't think Friedman himself has TDS. He seems like he is going along to get along, which explains replacement AI level of his writing.
Colbert firing is the first of many. The peak of shrill anti-Trumpism is in the rearview mirror. Will be interesting who adopts to the changes and who chooses to become extinct. Colbert clearly chose the latter.
yes yes yes...harumph harumph.....but....what about TRUMP?!?!
And even Karolyn’s Levitt, such a youngster, but comes to press conferences with receipts. I love her comment the other day when asks if Trump would allow protesters. Well, that’s a stupid question she says. She’s learning quickly from her boss and she’s doing it well.
OMG I just realized that Biden's senility is Trump's fault! Thank you for that!
MSNBC has been defenestrating some of their people too.
MS NOW!
So its a feminist channel? Ms. National Organization of Women?
Most Surely No One Watching
LOL!
MS NAH.
That's right, they've rebranded.
They should have gone with BSNBC
BSDNC
Most of these humorless stay the same; they just change the medium, i.e., substack, podcast …
Trump as Thanos. Brilliant!!