18 Comments
User's avatar
Matt Bivens, M.D.'s avatar

So proud ...

Expand full comment
AQ's avatar

This is absolutely ridiculous, a huge waste of time and I love it.

Expand full comment
Randall's avatar

Really going to need a little more detail on the Diet Coke thing.

Expand full comment
Auros's avatar

I think part of the joke is about the "mentos in diet coke" gag, but the other part is that Cesium, like anything in the light-metal family, reacts violently with water. Even just exposing it to the water vapor in the air can be dangerous.

https://youtu.be/fPk1hKLRyeE?t=129

Expand full comment
Randall's avatar

Thanks! I find this fascinating

Expand full comment
Auros's avatar

And of course if you blasted a piece of Cs-137 into smithereens by dropping it into a comparable volume of water, that would efficiently distribute a lot of extremely dangerous radioactive material. Don't try this at home, kids!

Expand full comment
Just Another Twatmonkey's avatar

Dr. Wood estimated that a Trumpian block of cesium-137 would contain about 1,000 moles of the substance. Trump's listed mass in kg is 243/2.204 = 110, whereas the molar mass of cesium-137 is about 137 g = 0.137 kg/mol. 110 kg/(0.137 kg/mol) = ~803, close enough to 1,000 for Taibbian work.

Dr. Wood was probably just rounding off given the extreme overall uncertainty of the real figure and a genial distaste for the whole project, but may have been bearing in mind that Trump's mass is one of the few things he's likely to *under*estimate.

Now, how many fucking seconds that I cannot reclaim, now or ever, did I spend on this? The Goldilocks amount, by personal fiat.

Expand full comment
Ryan K. Rigney's avatar

More of this please. Fantastic.

Expand full comment
Tom Worster's avatar

Thanks. I need to spend more time reading about science. To much PPE makes /me anxious.

Expand full comment
Tom Worster's avatar

I just realized that PPE means something else. I meant politics, philosophy and economics.

Expand full comment
Jordan Sanderson's avatar

Incredible

Expand full comment
James of the Beach's avatar

This article made me laugh while sitting here on a rather unusual Black Friday... or is it just normal for 2020.

Expand full comment
Adri's avatar

I laughed out loud, totally worth it!

Expand full comment
Robert's avatar

This cracked me up. I love it.

And I learned so much about cesium!

Expand full comment
Dos Chihuahuas's avatar

Literally laughed out loud on this one. Two thumbs up!

Expand full comment
Serge's avatar

write a simulation or bust

Expand full comment
Joe M's avatar

Had me a laff mate

Expand full comment
Medium Bad's avatar

This lack of caesium in our lives might explain all the Brunch Covidians these days.

Expand full comment