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ptb's avatar

I'm a Minnesotan (a condition that gets harder all the time). "Funny" isn't an adjective that would ever have come to mind for Amy Klobuchar. "The Marm" was my late husband's name for her. She is self-righteous, smug and self-satisfied. She believes in the vast right-wing conspiracy. She has no accomplishments. I have been baffled for years why Minnesotans keep voting her in by large margins--I don't think she even has an opponent this time. I'm not Republican, plenty of problems there. But I'll vote for them every time against her and her DFL colleagues. She pretends to Minnesota Nice but she's really Minnesota Nasty.

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Sarah's avatar

Oh hey there, fellow Minnesotan here. On behalf of my state, I’d like to apologize for the following, in addition to the hollow, conniving Senator Klobuchar:

1) Jesse Ventura

2) Al Franken

3) Tim Walz (our current governor, aka Covid-Will-Kill-Everyone-You-Know Tim, who is clearly priming the pump for “the national stage” to spread his blanket of errors from sea to shining sea - Lord have mercy, everybody run for the exits)

4) Dean Phillips - ditto above, but props for challenging Biden. I mean Obama. Good luck with that.

5) Row the Boat

6) Tator Tot Hotdish

7) Deepfried Oreos on a Stick

8) “Minnesota Nice” which is just Minnesota speak for I’ll cut you when you’re not looking.

9) Voting for Walter Mondale

You’re welcome for Loons, Snoopy, Prince, Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis, Fargo (just the original movie), Bob Dylan, and Vince Vaughn, Josh Hartnett, and Chris Pratt. And Winona Rider in Stranger Things.

Come visit our lovely lakes and pristine forests but don’t move here. For the love of all that is good, do not move here. 😬

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john peterson's avatar

Tater tots? They're a delicacy. Don't trash the Tots. Laugh. My Father was born on 'the Range" and I still own my Finnish ancestors homestead way up by the Boundry waters.

But why is Minneapolis hellbent on going communist? Can't they tell the difference between the old Scandinavian allegiance to social equality and the current left wing mob?

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Sarah's avatar

Yes, tator tots are absolutely delicious. Which is why smothering them in Campbell’s Cream of Chicken soup is just wrong. Nay, an abomination.

And both our Twin Cities Mpls and St Paul are hellbent on stupid. For a bunch of people who claim to be independent thinkers they sure all look like lemmings.

Critical Theory Mind Virus + Mob Cowardice = Minnesota

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john peterson's avatar

Thank god you understand the Tater Tots. A critical concept of high end cuisine. Only those with the most sophisticated palate appreciate them. Much like fine wine and good hot dogs.

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Ctommy1969's avatar

This made me laugh

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MH's avatar

Maybe Ilan Omar?? Voter harvesting suspect

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J. Matthews's avatar

You forgot Ilhan Omar.

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BMeowDawg's avatar

That’s nice of you, but please don’t make me start a list for California. It would be a Herculean task...

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publius_x's avatar

Rod Carew and Fran Tarkenton were worthwhile.

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feldspar's avatar

The old Met in Bloomington. Demolished and replaced by a Mall. The story of present day America in two structures.

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Outis's avatar

I may have sparred with you in the past, but I solidly agree with you here.

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Mark In Houston's avatar

Fran is from Georgia

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publius_x's avatar

And Rod Carew is from Panama. Thanks, dipshit.

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feldspar's avatar

That made me laugh.

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Mrs. McFarland's avatar

Rodney Roundhouse!

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Jeff Berg's avatar

Joe (was not:-) Kapp was my favorite.

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Nowhere Man's avatar

Don't forget Hüsker Dü and Low.

Q: You're sorry for Jesse Ventura but we're welcome for Vince Vaughan? I'd flip those.

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Outis's avatar

Hüsker Dü's "Zen Arcade" was a good album. Still have that LP.

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Nowhere Man's avatar

We call that "classic rock" in my house.

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Outis's avatar

Arrgh. I don't want to get into an taxonomic debate, but I'd call that album "post punk". :-)

That was a great era for punk: Black Flag's "Nervous Breakdown", SST Records, man...lots of music.

Husker Du were very distinctive and Zen Arcade is arguably their best work.

I got to see them at First Avenue when I lived up there. They were great live. I have worked with various musicians on various projects and I once met Grant Hart. He was a nice guy...as I just read he passed a few years ago. Man......

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Nowhere Man's avatar

That was a bit of a joke. All that 80s SST stuff is canon. Have you checked out the "You Don't Know Mojack" podcast?

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Outis's avatar

I was not aware - and will have to check it out! Thanks!

Also, understood on the joke part - I took the bait. :-)

While I don't get wrapped up in musicology, it is a fun past-time. :-)

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Nowhere Man's avatar

The guys who host it are nuts, they do one episode per SST catalog release, which is pretty fanatical. Sometimes they have guests, Steve Shelley, Kim Thayil and Mike Watt are among those who have joined them. The newish Jim Rutland SST book is good too, although a bit cursory, but not his fault -- there was a lot of ground to cover in not enough pages.

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Outis's avatar

What, you're saying that guys who do single podcast episodes on each release of the west coast's best thrash/punk/etc label are nuts?!?

Why, that would seem to be the most rational and sensible way to address the extended catalog of such an august publishing firm! I'm quite confident it's all properly and responsibly done!

:-)

I've got to rummage through my disks and find my copy of "The 7 Inch Wonders of the World". Loads of classics on that one. I'm going to have to investigate that book too - thanks for the reference!

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Chilblain Edward Olmos's avatar

Yep, Post Punk. An 80s college radio staple.

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The Scratch's avatar

And good hockey.

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madaboutmd's avatar

Ah, great mash up from your neighbor in WI. My husband's family did a big business at the state fair ... they only did the very large state fairs ... and we got to indulge is some of that state fair food. That's all we brought home from MN.

MN Is such a beautiful state but after George Floyd and insane liberal policies, many friends/family moved on out. I'm actually very sad to see what's happened to MN. Many thanks for Prince!

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YM's avatar

Tim Walz is a wannabe who is desperate to be on the national stage with Newsom and Whitmer. And no need to apologize for deepfried Oreos!

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Burnt taco's avatar

Ilhan Omar?

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dorothy P slater's avatar

And for this long-term choir person, don't forget Saint Olaf's Christmas program which is one of the ones I look forward to the best

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Lawyers Guns & Money's avatar

I was born in Minnesota. No money could make me live there again. There are two seasons: freezing (10 months) and sweaty.

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Floyd Boyd's avatar

Also, thanks for Kevin McHale and the Replacements!

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Chilblain Edward Olmos's avatar

Full disclosure: I kinda like Jesse “The Body” Ventura.

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Outis's avatar

He defeated Norm Coleman who then ran for the senate. I lived in Saint Paul when Coleman was mayor. He was a good mayor and I think likely would have been a better governor than senator. He was tacitly the heir to Arne Carlson who was maybe a very boring, milque-toast character but I think also a very effective and efficient governor of the state.

Ventura may have had good intentions but his policies were thoroughly ill-advised. The state's finances were not in good shape when he left office. He declared that he wasn't running for re-election as he had accomplished what he sought out to do. My suspicion is that he would have been run out on a rail. The traditional phrase "heart of gold and a head to match" may have applied to Ventura. Arguably not a bad dude but also arguably well out of his depth.

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bot_483's avatar

Keith Ellison, muslim colonialist from Detroit?

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Lawyers Guns & Money's avatar

Deep-fried anything was first done at the Texas State Fair. And who TF would you have voted for instead of Mondale? You remember who ran against him, right?

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Scuba Cat's avatar

Hop over the border to Sodak. 😀

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FlaMac's avatar

Every time I hear her speak I struggle to get the "little Hillary" image out of my mind. I wonder if her taste in men tends toward philanderers? As usual, Matt hit the nail squarely on the head.

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MH's avatar

Or the railroad spike squarely through his foot..lol

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Mike Eyre's avatar

I read your quote as "little Hitler." Same difference?

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Chilblain Edward Olmos's avatar

Kinda, although Hitler wasn’t completely phony like HRC.

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Yisraela's avatar

She more of a closeted ladies lady

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Connie the Cat's avatar

As a fellow Minnesotan I strongly concur!

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Wm. S. Loder's avatar

Agree. The biggest presumption is if your for someone your against the other. Great to see a Democrat with sense and wisdom. My best friend accused me of being a Trump supporter cause I’m anti Democrat. There is a major distinction.

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MH's avatar

Appalling that one is "accused" of supporting a political candidate as if it's a crime.

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ptb's avatar

I'm an independent, actually

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devoalan's avatar

Not much. And it’s you’re.

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Kelly Patchet's avatar

"The Marm," that's so perfect. Doff of the hat to your husband.

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michele burns's avatar

Minnesotans also call her “klobs” (rhymes with “slobs”) which hints at her lumbering boorishness.

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Julinthecrown's avatar

Man, did you hit the nail on the head. Amy K is about as funny as a broken crutch, IMO.

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Chilblain Edward Olmos's avatar

Madam, I take umbrage!

That’s an insult to the Broken Crutch Community!

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Julinthecrown's avatar

Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. My deepest apologies, Mr. Olmos. Please advise as to how I can make reparations to your community.

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Chilblain Edward Olmos's avatar

Brake my other crutch and all is forgiven.

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WAHomeowners's avatar

My cousin and her husband left MN as fast as they could upon retirement. They love TN!

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Yisraela's avatar

We are on our way to AZ

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Patrick's avatar

Not to mention that whiny, chalkboard scratching voice. Ewww!

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J. Lincoln's avatar

Patty Murray is Washington State's version of Amy Klobuchar, except Murray doesn't have the capacity to even pretend to have a sense of humour. Although inadvertently, both argue fervently for term limits in congress.

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Shelley's avatar

The undercurrent was Kamala was O’s pick, MSM was selectively attributing humor as a qualification for Amy and media outlets on the right were focused on Bernie rallies and the enigma that was Pete. The GOP presidential candidate debates with 17 was a circus. But Yikes, 23 Dems on stage trying to climb to the top of the socialist heap to be the second Hugo in America was appalling. With their answers to the questions they were fielding, I knew it matter not who became the nominee because surely Americans would not support becoming Venezuela. I was right. The aftermath was a ‘thou vigorously protest too much’ and not by Trump but by those espousing “the freest, fairest and securest election ever” – a supreme testament to the value of censorship.

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Chilblain Edward Olmos's avatar

People tend to like confidence. Even when there’s nothing to back it up. Sad.

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feldspar's avatar

Perhaps it's not confidence. She might be over-compensating for self-perceived personality "deficits." Perhaps Congresswoman Klobuchar is beset by low self-esteem and other rudimentary psychological maladies that often signal the presence of narcissism. Other potential indices include: Grandiosity. Savior complexes. Irregular bathing. Various nervous tics that act as diversions for other, more irritating nervous tics. Foul language in the early mornings and late evenings, that sort of thing.

She's a politician---an AMERICAN politician. She might even be a sociopath. Christ, even a psychopath. In which case she's sure to go after substack with unchecked ferocity, and in all probability even individual substacks. Hell, she might even target individual Racket News commenters! Run!

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Harrison Bergeron's avatar

"Irregular bathing"

That is gold

And quite an effective indicia, I'm sure

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Outis's avatar

Credit where credit is due: you can turn a phrase. I've disagreed with you on occasion but I do often enjoy how you write.

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Bill Cribben's avatar

And she failed to prosecute Derek Chauvin when he actually did something

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ptb's avatar

If you are saying that Chauvin and the 3 rookie cops shouldn't have been prosecuted for murder following George Floyd's death, I agree. At most Chauvin might have been open to a manslaughter charge for not recognizing the severity of Floyd's overdose-induced condition. There is now a new case open in MN--an assistant prosecutor who fought back on the charges against the other 3 says she was the victim of retaliation by the head County Attorney in the office later. She cites the info known to anyone following the story at the time, that the initial autopsy report was "natural causes" with high fentanyl toxicity--and the medical examiner later backed off that when he testified.

Despite the video, it never made common-sense that Chauvin would brazenly murder a black man in front of a crowd, with people taking videos of it. I believe (and I don't assume he's necessarily a sweetheart) Chauvin thought he was taking charge of a volatile situation, going to show the rookies how it was done (according to Mpls Police Training tactics, while an ambulance was on its way) and didn't realise the severity of Floyd's condition. Watch the much longer police bodycam footage to see what went on before Floyd got down on the ground, to see the cops' patience and courtesy.

I wish a journalist of Matt's stature could take this one on, as it transformed society (in a bad way) after that day. I suppose I'll get a lot of nasty replies but this has been a big injustice.

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Bonnie Beresford's avatar

I agree with you on Chauvin. He was insensitive but as an experienced cop, he has seen every trick in the book from arrestees trying to lie, scam and bluff their way out of an arrest. Floyd pulled the old "I'm claustrophobic" chestnut to avoid being put in the cop car, and even "I can't breathe" is a common way of getting police officers to lighten their restraint, a tactic that has resulted in many a successful break-away.

Cops have a very tough job. Crowds of snotty bystanders videotaping everything do not help them do their very tough jobs, especially when considering that the cops are responsible for the safety of the arrestee AND of the hostile crowds who spill into traffic while "getting the goods" on the cops.

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madaboutmd's avatar

How about the Jacob Blake arrest in Kenosha, WI sparking riots because he resisted arrest after kidnapping his children while violating the restraining order of his former girlfriend/mother of his children, attempting to steal her car, and pulling a knife on the officers. Three years later, Kenosha has still not recovered.

We don't live in a world anymore where we can all see the just the facts....whether it's Derek Chauvin or the officer in the Blake arrest.

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feldspar's avatar

Floyd pulled the ultimate scam by actually dying. What a huckster!

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Lekimball's avatar

Yes well he didn't die because of anything Chauvin did. The most, the very most he should have been charged with was negligent homicide for not getting him help. And police protocol probably can always be improved. However, he was saying he couldn't breathe before he was even on the ground. What they did to Chauvin is criminal. It wasn't justice.

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Outis's avatar

Chauvin could and arguably should have conducted himself differently. It's of course very easy to say what one would do in a situation with an agitated group of onlookers in one of the lousier areas of Minneapolis. It's "South Minneapolis", maybe a mile south of Lake Street, and I remember the convenience store: "Cup Foods" was presumably a play on "Cub Foods" which is/was one of the bigger grocery store chains in the state. It's not a super bad area but not "good" either; there are loads of low-level criminals in the area.

Specifically, I'd recommend you read:

1.) George Floyd's autopsy which is available online. The dude had an 11 ng/ml fentanyl blood concentration. By all accounts I've read, that would easily be a fatal level for most people (7 ng/ml or higher seems to be the agreed upon lethal concentration). Add on to that the methamphetamine, nor-fentanyl and other drugs he had in his system on top of a serious heart condition the coroner diagnosed...and you've got a guy who is in a genuinely compromised condition.

You can check this too: one of the side-effects of opiods is increased congestion in the lungs and a depression of respiratory function. Ergo, the "I can't breathe" may well have been due to his drug consumption. There is apparently ongoing debate as to what Floyd was recorded as saying in some of the bodycam footage ("I ate too much drugs" or "I ain't do no drugs") but there was collected evidence of fentanyl pills with Floyd's saliva found in the car. One question being whether Floyd tried to hide the drugs by consuming them before the police found them. The cashier at the convenience store who called the police said that Floyd visibly appeared under the influence. I've seen the cc footage and the Floyd does appear to be weaving about as he stands in line.

2.) The testimony in the current trial in Hennepin County (which includes Minneapolis). The testimony I've read indicates that the coroner was concerned that his results would be met negatively because they didn't match the narrative already at play. I've seen some screenshots of the testimony but can't find a source. Heh, an "official" one, that is. That alone I find more than just somewhat suspicious. But the claim is that there was pressure for the autopsy to agree with the story that was already circulating.

I hope the full testimony will become available. What's typical and anti-hilarious is that there are LOADS of links to articles declaring Tucker Carlson is wrong in quoting the testimony but that also do not include the testimony. It's all quite suspicious in all the usual ways.

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Lekimball's avatar

Sure is right. He didn't murder the guy and he didn't intend to and he died of all the drugs he was on or he wouldn't have been saying he couldn't breathe while he was still in the car. Of course, logic doesn't matter to you, I imagine. Negligent homicide MIGHT have been reasonable or manslaughter closer. But not first degree murder. Insane.

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Lawyers Guns & Money's avatar

feldspar, I'm trying to determine which is most delusional: ptb, Ladyhawk, or Lekimball.

Do you suppose any of them read Taibbi's "I Can't Breathe"? Just another black criminal trying to get out of it. Dying had nothing to do with the cops.

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William Taylor's avatar

Why are you unable to factor in that Floyd's heart rate was elevated to 200 beats/minute, prior to the encounter with Chauvin, from the drugs in his system? Oh that's right, feelings.

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dorothy P slater's avatar

Glenn Lowry has been saying since the beginning, that Floyd did not die of chauvin's foot. I hope that Chauvin gets another trial and we stop jumping to conclusions before the last breath is taken. Yes, Floyd's quote murder quote did start off a whole string of terrible consequences for all concerned

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Lawyers Guns & Money's avatar

Where to even begin...

Did you see the photos? It was a knee, BTW.

And I'm pretty sure the last breath had already been taken when we realized we just watched a cop murder a man.

Put that crack pipe down, dorothy

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madaboutmd's avatar

Actually the knee was not on the neck. Have you seen the footage from the other angle. You really might want to do some more of your own research after you put your crack pipe down.

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Lawyers Guns & Money's avatar

What planet are you from? The left knee is on the back of the neck of a man who is held face down on the street. Chauvin's left knee, just below where his left hand is in his pants pocket. Cops used to get away with this shit all the time. Before cell phone cameras.

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madaboutmd's avatar

I'm from the planet called REALITY, sometimes called FACTS BASED ON EVIDENCE. You owe it to yourself to join me on this happy planet where those who live is disillusion are kicked out.

Actually educate yourself with ALL of the evidence. It's all there for the taking.

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Lawyers Guns & Money's avatar

Well, I'm from earth. is REALITY nearby? Is it like Pluto, maybe a planet, maybe not? Please feel free to post a link to a photo showing otherwise. Since you want us to consider ALL of the evidence.

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ptb's avatar

Warren Zevon is turning in his grave

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Virg's avatar

Tucker Carlson did an interesting video on this recently. I see Chauvin being exonerated at some point if there is any justice in the justice system. Except, can you imagine the riots that would result?

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ptb's avatar

You mean "mostly peaceful protests," of course.

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madaboutmd's avatar

I honestly don't care how you feel about Candace Owens (as a political commentator) but she did a bang up job on the BLM movie The Greatest Lie Ever Told starting with the death of GF (what was in his car, how they found him in the car, where Chauvin actually had his knee on GF and personal stuff about Chauvin. Looks like Derek Chauvin was the scapegoat.

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Lawyers Guns & Money's avatar

So you're saying he was "instructing" the rookies? In what lesson? How to keep the coloreds down? Lynching's not allowed, but watch this...?

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Grape Soda's avatar

Without looking it up, my guess is she comes from money and or is allied with a particular political dynasty. Power has little to do with intelligence

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ptb's avatar

Her father was a well-known newspaperman in the Twin Cities, so she had name recognition. She was a prosecutor with some reputation for toughness (some of that was backfiring on her during the 2020 presidential contest). I didn't pay that much attention to her when she was a local figure, so not versed on the details.

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feldspar's avatar

"I'm not Republican," but, but, but....

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ptb's avatar

what's your point?

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feldspar's avatar

Why instruct the audience that you're not a Republican? My assumption is that you're not a Seventh-Day Adventist or a member of the Odd Fellows either. It's not germane to your argument.

It actually amuses me when Racket News commenters (there are a lot of them, you're not alone) who declaim "I'm not a Republican, but"..."I can't stand Trump, but"...and then proceed to sound awfully Republican or enumerate all the "good" things our former president and future felon did while in office.

Smacks of disingenuousness. It's both trope and tell. One of the oldest and still prevalent theories of independent voters posited by political scientists is that independent voters lean hard toward either one of the two parties but don't wish to make that known, for whatever reason or reasons. I'm not arguing this holds true for you, but...

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Milo Gerber's avatar

Trump has never been a Republican, merely "Republican" because he saw an opportunity there. I was Republican, but find myself truly disliking most Republicans I meet these days, and tend to support independents and moderate Libertarians. The Congress, almost in its entirety, just makes me feel ill, and I could never think Democrat because I find myself truly disliking most Democrats I meet :-) . I'm a Rilke fan, and tend to gravitate to those who lack strong opinions, or conclusions.

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Lekimball's avatar

No, many people did not like Trump's personality but that isn't policy and many liked that he exposed this corruption. The establishment elitists couldn't have this upstart outsider in there they couldn't control. But they wish he wouldn't keep shooting himself in the foot. That is not "disingenuous." When it comes to politics all people normally have to hold their nose and vote for the lesser of evils because no political platform or person is perfect. Why would they think he's perfect? Independents, too, often share a lot of Republican values, so nothing wrong with saying you're not a Republican.

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feldspar's avatar

You're not addressing my comment. "Couldn't control." A locution without meaning. The only corruption Trump exposed was his own. Please. Enough with the Townhall and OAN propaganda talking points. Plenty of corruption in Washington and Trump not only added to it, he handily, by a wide margin, out-corrupted the already corrupt. So there's that.

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Dims Stink's avatar

How could anyone address your comments?

They're so meandering and full of nonsense you've convinced yourself is true that they make no intelligible point.

You seem to think Marxism, wokism and every other bad idea gaining currency in the last 10 years is true. Beyond that, no one can decipher what you say.

And "the problem" is not us ... it's you.

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feldspar's avatar

More complaints by the junior high school students from down the street. I can get a pretty good read on the other customers here by a quick check of who they follow on substack.

You do realize that Seth Dillon is an idiot? Don't you? Here's your boy, dipshit Dillon, amusingly (and presumably inadvertently) categorizing (albeit correctly) most of the right-wing chud chatter online as misinformation and hate speech:

..."I think it's bad, especially when the censorship is heavy-handed in categories like "misinformation" and "hate speech" which tend to block conservative viewpoints..."

At least he's honest---if very, very stupid. Ya, Seth, if you set up an algorithm to block bullshit and empty threats, that pretty much shuts down 95% of the right-wing chud chatter online. Hey, Dims Wit---you still with me here? Let me know if I should go a bit slower or stop to explain some of there more sophisticated elements in my comment.

Here, let me translate if not simplify the above for you: Seth Dillon is a moron and right-wing chud. And an assumption I've made in the last 5 minutes is that you tread water with right-wing chud/morons such as Seth Dillion, so...

Ya folluh?

I assume you tread water with this cohort?

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Dims Stink's avatar

I bet you check out all the boys. 😂

Seth Dillon is a comedian. Again, take your meds and get out of the basement for at least two hours a day. You've lost touch with reality

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feldspar's avatar

Fag-taunting, too. The whole Racket News commenter tool kit. You must be one of Taibbi's public relations clerks. Again, you had trouble understanding my previous comment. Seth Dillion is not a comedian. Seth Dillion is a moron and right-wing chud.

No quiz today, fortunately.

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Dims Stink's avatar

Is it a taunt if you're a fag? 😂

Get out of your mom's basement. Or just go to Canada and get euthanized.

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ptb's avatar

Well, you're showing a lot of biases there. When I say I oppose the policies Dems are trying to force through, I don't want people to assume I'm therefore a Republican. I'm not, but I'll vote for them as the Opposition. And yes, I do think Trump is obnoxious, but his presidency was much less damaging to the US than Biden's has been.

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feldspar's avatar

Sort of what I was getting at.

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